Question: I often have a spasm in my arms during the meditation. What is that and can I leave it as it is?

Guru: It is quite normal, it is not the spasm, it is the kundalini energy rising and you have no control – it goes like that. Thank goodness it is not anywhere else because you would be jumping around. I have two friends here from Skanda Vale who have different reactions to kundalini. There is no one single rule to kundalini, people try to fly, they jump around and they want to swim. There is a reference to the lifestyle they had earlier and they begin to react. Occasionally they growl!

I want all of you to meditate, I will teach you, but you must apply it. In these few days that we have got here, it is only if you apply it then you can question me and ask me if you have any problems. Then we have a good partnership, working partnership. Question, find out, I am here and I will help you.

Devotion & trust

Question: Guruji sometimes when I am sitting I feel the energy coming up to here and then I get frightened, I think I’ll lose my head. And then it is like running away.

Guru: When you have that energy rising, think that the Divine Mother is the energy. And you look at the Divine Mother and say “Oh!” She will really start coming up, don’t worry. She will never run away. She will go straight to your head and create more problems for you – but that is what you need. Those are problems that teach you to master yourself. Look at Her constantly. Never take your eyes away from Her in your mind’s eye. You know the aspect of the Divine Mother you like, or you have an association with, and you say “Please come, be with me, travel in my whole being.”

I will share an experience with you… not one many experiences: When I go to sleep, She regards me as Her play child and so She comes and stands at the foot of the bed. I say “Here we go!” and slowly any single muscle of my body starts rippling like the ocean. Can you imagine? Even the toe muscle – all of them are rippling. You know that is Her energy. You have to watch this energy rising. I have learned now to sit back and say “Here we go.” I am watching this coming through my whole body, engaging every tiny minute cell in the body. Yes, enjoy it.

And sometimes you may well feel an inadequacy. Do you know why that is? Because you are not in control of your ship then, the Divine Mother is. Hand it to Her. Never mind if you die. It doesn’t matter. I always say to myself “Here we go – never mind if I die, I am so happy with You!”

Give of yourself, surrender, free yourself! Don’t worry! Think of me if you want to laugh. The experience of the Divine – gain for yourself. She is not a figment of the imagination. Everybody thinks that God is male only – that is for the chauvinists. God is also female, Shakti. I can’t see God going around laying eggs! I can’t see God being the Mother, except a Mother who is God and God is Mother. Both are duality. You are also a duality and this energy is a part of the whole universe.

If men think that they are so male then I can tell you – if you see a real big burly man – there is nothing nice about it. Because it is not tempered with the gentleness of the female aspect. The same with the woman: You have the woman but it is tempered by the male aspect within the woman. And both go side by side and you need that power inside you. And that is why I refer to the Divine Mother as Shakti because She is the power who is working in the whole universe and you refer to its nature.

You talk about nature, Mother Nature, the earth – yes, She is Mother. She is nurturing the whole universe and caring for it. And that is the process which we are evolving to integrate with Her. Don’t be afraid.

A funny story about kundalini moments in public

It is terribly funny; Swami and I go shopping for the community every Wednesday. And like any other human being, we are very happy to get into the car and drive and I know that everything is ok. But then when we arrive in the car park we are discussing how and what we have to do, and Mother thinks that She should keep an eye on my activities, so She decides to come into the car to see me.

And from that moment I am not in control of my body. And my body shakes and so Swami sits and says: ‘We wait a little while’. And when I think I can control it and handle the situation then I go shopping. And it is rather amusing to see somebody arrive who is absolutely in a sense normal, shaking his head in front of the greengrocer and says: ‘I’ll have two pounds of onions’. I have no control and the poor man looks at me in the weirdest fashion thinking ‘Oh poor chap, he is suffering from epilepsy or Parkinson disease, he cannot be quiet’.

So really you have no ego, your ego is really crushed by the Divine consciousness. I am very bad company to be out with. I tell you why, because it raises the kundalini of a lot of people. It energises people and some people find it difficult to handle. That is why we withdraw away from people because sometimes it can become too much.

Other people, in spite of all the persecution, they want more. A little and often does you good.

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